Well known poet, Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “A man is what he thinks about all day long.” In other words, if we dwell on the negative parts of our life, every aspect of our being will reflect negativity. But if we focus on the positive nuggets of our situation, we create positive surroundings for our self.
In his book, The Power of Positive Thinking, Norman Vincent Peale supports this thinking when he states, “Conditions are created by thoughts far more powerfully than conditions create thoughts. Think positively, for example, and you set in motion positive forces which bring positive results to pass. … On the contrary, think negative thoughts and you create around yourself an atmosphere propitious to the development of negative results.”
Did you catch that? Conditions are created by thoughts far more powerfully than conditions create thoughts. Dr. Peale is suggesting that we influence our situation with our thinking. So, if we want our stepchildren to respond positively toward us, we need to create that scenario in our head. When we think positively toward them and expect positive behavior from them, they will begin to respond that way.
Our demeanor reflects what we are thinking. When we have negative thoughts circling through our mind, we give off negative vibes toward those around us. Our stepchildren can feel our negativity and will react accordingly.
I have seen this happen with my own stepchildren. If I choose to dwell on negative thoughts toward them, I respond to them with an insensitive spirit and critical remarks. Even if I don’t say anything, my nonverbal language speaks volumes. They can sense my negativity with them and respond in anger or frustration.
On the other hand, if I choose to think positively toward them and my verbal and nonverbal language reflects a like demeanor, they feel loved and accepted. It’s easy for them to respond favorably toward a loving spirit.
Are you up for a challenge? Think only positive thoughts about your stepchildren today. If something negative creeps into your mind, turn it around and find a positive twist. See if it makes a difference. Leave a comment and let me know the results.
Will you focus on positive thinking today with your stepchildren?
Life’s Too Short to Stay Mad
Being Thankful for Stepchildren
When Our Thinking Becomes Distorted